MWPP - The Marauders

Marauders in moody monochrome

Based on Joshua Tree by U2

Image © 2005 by Red Scharlach

* = post-OOP
** = post-HBP

See also the full-length musicals Marauder Rouge and That Rat Worth Keeling, both by RJ Lupin

Copyright 2000-2003 by Caius Marcius except Polkas in '75 Copyright 2003 by Shay Caron; Animagus Copyright 2003 by Pixieberry; Here Comes the Sun, It's My Phonograph, The Last Marauder, Little Pronglet , The Night of Sirius' Prank and We Are the Marauders Copyright 2004, 2005 by RJ Lupin; Oh What A Night Copyright 2004 by Jason LeBouef; The Best Player At Quidditch, Furry Little Problem and James, Lily, and Sirius Copyright 2004, 2006 by Murasaki; Shriek Shack Copyright 2005 by Wolfwoman; Lycanthrope and Three Cheers for the Marauders Copyright 2005, 2006 by Nelsongirl; Uncle Albus/Slytherin Severus Copyright 2005 by Ginger; The Marauders and Me (What Really Happened) and What You Waiting For? Copyright 2005 by Fyre; He's In The Shack and Hogwarts School Dropout Copyright 2006 by Prankaholic

To the tune of Good Day Sunshine by the Beatles

THE SCENE: Gryffindor Commons in the early 70s. The young REMUS LUPIN, confronted by his three best friends, confesses the truth of his handicap

REMUS:
Bad night moonlight, bad night moonlight, bad night moonlight

The moon each month it waxes gibbously
It then changes me quite hideously
I'm sprouting fur in a savage way
I'm a wolf out prowling for his prey

Bad night moonlight, bad night moonlight, bad night moonlight

If we should meet while moon is shining bright
They'll have to give you guys last rites

Bad night moonlight, bad night moonlight, bad night moonlight

REMUS walks away, expecting that his friends will shun him henceforth. But the three lay their hands on him and affirm their camaraderie

SIRIUS, JAMES & PETER
If you retreat into the Shrieking Shack
We'll stay safe from your wolf attacks
Although it's sad that you're a lycanthrope
You have friends now who will help you cope

ALL
Good friends outshine, good friends outshine bad night moonlight…….

A filk by Murasaki to the tune of Dirty Little Secret by The All-American Rejects

Remus panics but then is calmed and agrees to share his secrets as James, Sirius, and Peter confront him about his "furry little problem."

REMUS:
You tell me you have found it out:
I've blown my cover; there's no doubt.
I'll fill in the odds and ends,
Hoping I can trust my friends.

I'll tell you 'bout every month I spend--
Agony that just never ends--
You are the only ones who I can tell!

I'll tell you my furry little problem--

JAMES/SIRIUS/PETER:
Furry little problem!

REMUS:
Don't tell anyone--
Or everyone me all will start to condemn!

JAMES/SIRIUS/PETER:
All will start to condemn; you really cannot
trust them!

REMUS:
Furry little problem.
No one can know!

When I bear such dark secrets
It's hard not to have regrets--
But I'll fill on the odds and ends
Hoping I can trust my friends.

I'll tell you of that special room
In which I spend each full moon;
You are all the only ones who I can tell!

I'll tell you my furry little problem--

JAMES/SIRIUS/PETER:
Furry little problem!

REMUS:
Don't tell anyone--
Or everyone me all will start to condemn!

JAMES/SIRIUS/PETER: All will start to condemn; you really cannot
trust them!

REMUS:
Furry little problem.
No one can know!

Knowing in you I trust,
How can our friendship bust?
I feel you won't betray--

JAMES/SIRUS/PETER:
No way!

REMUS:
So I don't have to hide away.
I'll tell you anyway:
It will be okay!

I'll tell you my furry little problem--

JAMES/SIRIUS/PETER:
Furry little problem!

REMUS:
Don't tell anyone--
Or everyone me all will start to condemn!

JAMES/SIRIUS/PETER:
All will start to condemn!

REMUS:
I'll tell you my furry little problem--

JAMES/SIRIUS/PETER:
Furry little problem!

REMUS:
Don't tell anyone--
Or everyone me all will start to condemn!

JAMES/SIRIUS/PETER:
All will start to condemn; you really cannot trust them!

REMUS:
Furry little problem.
Furry little problem.
No one can know!
No one can know!

To the tune of Swing on a Star, from Bing Crosby's 1944 movie Going My Way

The Scene: Behind locked doors at Gryffindor, a generation or so distant. SIRIUS BLACK, JAMES POTTER, and PETER PETTIGREW have reached the point in their Animagi studies that they are now ready to select the type of animal into which they will transform

ALL
Advanced magic we now can perform
As Animagi, we will change form
And transcend ev'ry human norm

SIRIUS
I'd think I'd rather be a dog.
A dog is a loyal creature whose faithfulness grows
He can track anything down with his nose.

PETER AND JAMES
He patiently learns when to sit and stay
For he knows that every dog will have his day

SIRIUS
And therefore I think it would be fine
To change myself to a canine

ALL
Would you like to learn to change shape
Anything from a frog to an ape
And get a laugh on Severus Snape?

JAMES
I think I'd rather be a stag
A stag is a creature full of grandeur and grace
His fleetness will win him any race.

SIRIUS AND PETER
He takes toward no one an unfriendly tone
But he will guard his children 'til they're fully grown

JAMES
And since I would live life without fear
I think I'll be that kind of deer

ALL
To fulfill one of our deepest dreams
A variation on human themes
And be whatever creature we deem

PETER
I think I'd rather be a rat
A rat is a tiny creature of shadow and night
Yet everyone fears its savage bite.

SIRIUS AND JAMES
It needs very little in order to survive
Its first priority's to stay alive

PETER
And although I see that you're shocked by that
I'd think I'd rather be a rat.

ALL
We'll now take the Proteus road
We accept what the future may bode
For who yet can decipher its code?

SIRIUS and JAMES (to PETER)
It's OK to be a rat, we think
But please don't turn out a ratfink!

A filk by R.J. Lupin to the tune of Dancing Queen by Abba (also done by the A*Teens)

Just a general "We're the best 'cause we're Marauders" song. Go ahead and picture them dancing around in the corridors

JAMES, SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
Ooh...
We can prank, we can rule
Being the top of the school
Ooh
If mischief does occur
It is the Marauders

Full moon night and the sky is low
We know just where we're gonna go
First to the Shrieking Shack and
Then around Hogsmeade
Four animals in the lead
And nobody knows more than we
About Hogsmeade and Hogwarts, see
We're the mighty Marauders, yeah we are Remus
Peter, Sirius and James
They'll remember our names

We are the Marauders
Hogwarts' mischievious prankers
Marauders
The fine Marauder's Map makers
Oh yeah
We can prank, we can rule
Being the top of the school
Ooh
If mischief does occur
It is the Marauders

Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, Prongs
With names like that you can't go wrong
There's no one who can stop us
Not a thing at all
Even when we make a mess
We're still a school sucess

We are the Marauders
Hogwarts' mischievious prankers
Marauders
The fine Marauder's Map makers
Oh yeah
We can prank, we can rule
Being the top of the school
Ooh
If mischief does occur
It is the Marauders

We are the Marauders
We are the Marauders
We are the Marauders

To the tune of The Little Old Lady from Pasadena by Jan and Dean

Enter JAMES, SIRIUS, REMUS & PETER as youthful Hogwarts students. Enter PERCY, FRED, GEORGE AND RON WEASLEY as BACKUP

ALL: We're the mighty Marauders who are Animagi
BACKUP: Go Potter Go Potter Go Potter Go
JP & PP: We have never been described as being stage-shy
BACKUP Go Peter Go Peter Go Peter Go
ALL: We're Remus and Sirius, Peter and James
Forever will Hogwarts remember our names!

JP & SB: When the full moon arose, Remus started a-howlin'
RL: And my three friends said, "Here's a new way of prowlin'
JP, SB, & PP: We'll learn advanced magic to take animal shape
RL & SB: A quartet of mammals vs. Severus Snape
ALL: We're the mighty Marauders who are Animagi……

JP & SB: Remus needn't worry, cause we got his backside
BACKUP Go Remus Go Remus Go Remus Go
PP & RL: We're not freakin' as we're seekin' for the Shriekin' Shackside
BACKUP Go Padfoot Go Padfoot Go Padfoot Go
SB & PP: We'll be hailed in fanart and fanfics and songs
ALL: As Moony and Padfoot and Wormtail and Prongs!

The Quartet suddenly appear as adults

PP: When Remus was wolfin' he might have attacked us
SB & JP: He's now a professor who can preach what he practiced
RL: James is dead, Black was framed, and what about Peter?
RL, SB & JP: He's the servant of Lord Voldemort, an avid Death Eater
ALL: But we once were Marauders who were Animagi
ALL & BACKUP: Et expecto!

A filk by R.J. Lupin to the Tonight Reprise from West Side Story

SCENE:The night of Sirius' prank. Sirius is roaming the halls, singing of how excited he is for Snape to be pranked. Snape roams another part of the halls, excited to find out where Remus goes and to surprise him tonight. James and Peter are in the Gryffindor Boys' Dormitory, planning the full moon night's adventure and getting the invisibiliy cloak and things, wondering where Sirius is. Remus is already in the Shrieking Shack, sitting around and dreading the transformation, yet anticipating it at the same time, and waiting for his friends

SIRIUS:
Padfoot is gonna have his day
Tonight
Padfoot is gonna have his way
Tonight
I've got a wicked prank planned
Nicely
And Snivellus' gonna land
In trouble, he'll see

SNAPE:
Now I am fin'lly gonna know
Tonight
Wherever Lupin'd go
Tonight
Black said, "Although I'm mindin'
You'll know
That if you wanna find him
Go through the Willow
Tonight"

SIRIUS:
He's gonna get it tonight
That little greasy haired ugly kind of loon

SNAPE:
I'm gonna find out tonight
I'm gonna know his little secret real soon

SIRIUS:
Since he began it-

SNAPE:
Since they began it-

SIRIUS & SNAPE:
And I'm the one to make him fall to his doom
Tonight!

JAMES & PETER:
We're gonna roam around the town
Tonight
We're gonna check Hogsmeade around
Tonight
We know Moony's waiting in
The Shack
But Padfoot we have not seen
When will he be back?

REMUS:
Tonight, tonight
A bloody full moon night
Tonight I will transform yet again
Tonight, tonight
Won't be that bad tonight
After all, I will be with my friends
Today
All day we had been planning
Our full moon night's adventure
It's better than alright
Moon, just grow bright
Transform me and put my friends in sight...

SIRIUS:
Well Snivellus will fin'lly see
Tonight
The whole big mystery
Tonight
I'm sure I can be tellin'
He's run
And once he starts up yellin'
It'll really be fun
Tonight!

Sirius finds Snape in the hallway and sings with him and at the same time, Remus sings

SIRIUS: (At the same time as the below)
So do you know where it is?
SNAPE:
Right
SIRIUS:
You're gonna be there tonight?
SNAPE:
Right
SIRIUS:
Good, Sniv'llus
SNAPE:
What'd you say?!
SIRIUS:
I said go soon, that'll be right
SNAPE:
Tonight...

REMUS (at the same time as the above):
Tonight, tonight
A bloody full moon night
Tonight I will transform yet again

Sirius and Snape walk off in different directions

SNAPE:
I'm gonna find out tonight

JAMES and PETER:
Tonight...

At this point, everyone begins singing at the same time until the end

SNAPE:
I'm gonna find out tonight
Yes I will find out tonight -tonight
They began it -they began it
And I'm the one
To make them fall to their doom!
Now Snape is gonna have his way
Now Snape is gonna have his day
There will be mischeif tonight
Tonight!

JAMES and PETER:
Tonight
Full moon night
We're up to no good tonight
We had planned it all out today
We had planned it all out today
All of it's gonna go our way
Tonight -tonight
Tonight- this full moon night
There will be mischief tonight
Tonight!

SIRIUS:
He began it
He began it
We'll make him fall to his doom
Padfoot is gonna have his way
Sniv'llus is gonna have to pay
There will be mischeif tonight
Tonight!

REMUS:
Tonight, tonight
Won't be that bad tonight
After all, I will be with my friends
Today
All day we had been planning
Our full moon night's adventure
It's better than alright
Moon, just grow bright
Transform me and put my friends in sight
Tonight!

A filk by Ginger to the tune of Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey by Sir Paul McCartney.

The Scene: James and Sirius have been taken to McGonagall's office after the Prank. Anxious to eavesdrop, Severus has hidden inside an oddly echoing adjoining broom closet.

Dumbledore enters the scene. "Explain yourselves." he says.

James and Sirius affect their most beguiling personas and wheedling tones.

JAMES AND SIRIUS
We're so sorry, Uncle Albus.
We're so sorry we've brought Gryffindor to shame.
We're so sorry, Uncle Albus,
But we're really not as bad
As dear old Sevvie wants to claim.

We're so sorry, Uncle Albus.
We're so sorry, but we thought it was a joke to play.
We're so sorry, Uncle Albus,
But old Sevvie is a git and we just thought he'd go away.

SEVERUS (in the closet)
Heads of the Marauders ('rauders)
Heads are gonna fly.
Heads of the Marauders ('rauders)
Heads are gonna fly.

DUMBLEDORE
Slytherin Severus notified me
He followed your advise and he went up to a tree.
He went to take a look and just what did he see-
But Werewolf Guy.
(The full moon had arose, so he was no more a guy.)

SEVERUS
Heads of the Marauders ('rauders)
Heads are gonna fly.
Heads of the Marauders ('rauders)
Heads are gonna fly.

Oh, I feel a little tipsy-
Get around. (get around)
Get around this, Stag and Hound.
Wanna see you get around.

Repeat

Reprise of Heads of the Marauders

At this time, we don't know if they did get around it, but there are two more books. Maybe we'll find out.

A filk by Jason LeBouef to the tune of Oh What A Night (December 1963) by Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons

Let's do a little time turning to the original Hogwarts trio reminiscing about their first night at Hogwarts

JAMES
Oh what a night!
Late September back in 71
What a special time for everyone
As a remember what a night.

LUPIN
Oh what a night!
I still remember when she called my name
I was never gonna be the same
At the sorting, what a night

SIRIUS
Oh I …
I got a funny feeling when she walked us in the room
And I …
As I recall it ended much to soon

JAMES
Oh what a night!
Witches wizards all surrounding me
It was nothing like I'd thought it be
Magic evening what a night

LUPIN
She spoke my name like a rolling ball of thunder
Grabbing the sorting hat and wearing my head went under

SIRIUS
Oh what a night!

JAMES
Oh I…
Got a funny feeling when we walked on through the door
Yes I
Remember when the hat said "Gryffindor!"

LUPIN
Oh what a night!
Eating food by magic candlelight
Dumbledore, he's gonna teach us right
What a dinner, what a night!

SIRIUS
She spoke my name like a rolling ball of thunder
Grabbing the sorting hat and wearing my head went under

JAMES, LUPIN, SIRIUS
Oh what a night!
Doo doo doodoo doo doo… doo doo doodoo
Oh what a night!
Doo doo doodoo doo doo… doo doo doodoo

repeat until song fades

A filk by Murasaki to the tune of My Band by D12

The teenage Marauders:

JAMES:
I don't know dude.
I think everyone's all jealous and stuff
Because I'm the best Seeker in history, dude.
And I think everyone who's got a problem with me, dude,
They need to take it up with me after the game,
Because . . .

Though I am Pureblood I'm not really rich,
And a couple of times I have missed the Snitch,
But all the girls see me and they all get the itch,
All because I'm the best player at Quidditch.

So I fly the Quidditch pitch, right, and catch the Snitch,
Walk up to these hot chicks and I'm all like,
"What's up, hotties, I'm James Potter.
I'm just good; I'm not tryin' to be snotty."
They're all like, "Oh, Merlin, I saw the game!
Hestia, oh my freaking gosh it's James!
I swear to Merlin you're like a prodigy!
Please, oh please, will you sit with me?"
And now all the rest of the fellows get pissed,
Especially when I whip them all at Quidditch.
Snivellus is the worst, so I flip him upside-down
So you can all see his panties when his robes go down.
So then every single day Lily has to fight with me,
But when we fight, it's really like she's hitting on me,
'Cause one of these days she'll hook up with me.
Dude, I think she's just trying to get a rise out of me.
Yesterday Snivellus pulled his wand on me
Because I told him Lily really only liked me.
This sports star fame, it's the life for me,
And all the other guys just despise me
Because . . .

Though I am Pureblood I'm not really rich,
And a couple of times I have missed the Snitch,
But all the girls see me and they all get the itch,
All because I'm the best player at Quidditch.

REMUS:
You don't want to date a werewolf, do you,
But how come nice boys don't get girls like athletes do?
I'm sweet and quiet, and I don't only think of me,
But girls surround him and I'm just lonely.
James doesn't want my friendship; he wants my homework,
(to James) And I'm not going to give it to you!

JAMES:
Well, you're a jerk!

REMUS:
And what on earth is wrong with the Shrieking Shack?
James, did you bring people in there behind my back?
It smells kind of funny; I'm getting suspicious-
(to James) Did you just say that girl was "bootilicious?"
Never mind; I don't want to know.
Just next time clean up the place before you go.

JAMES:
Though I am Pureblood I'm not really rich,
And a couple of times I have missed the Snitch,
But all the girls see me and they all get the itch,
All because I'm the best player at Quidditch.

SIRIUS (to Remus): Look at the little punk; he's so vain.
REMUS: Yeah, I know, Padfoot; it's really a pain.
SIRIUS (to all): Hey, I thought we had detention in Potions, dude.
JAMES: No, you had detention; not me, fool.
REMUS (to Sirius): You're going to be late for Charms class.
SIRIUS: Man, I'm not going to Charms class.
REMUS: I do all your work for you and his grades are still best- you know,
I'm going to say something.
SIRIUS (to James): Hey, yo Prongs!
JAMES: You got something to say?
REMUS (to James): Man, no!
SIRIUS (to Remus): I thought you were about to tell him off, Moony, what's up?
REMUS (to Sirius): I'll tell him what I feel like, Padfoot, shut up. And you
weren't going to back me up, and according to the fangirls, we're supposed to be gay-
SIRIUS: I would have backed you up- wait, WHAT DID YOU SAY?

JAMES:
Though I am Pureblood I'm not really rich,
And a couple of times I have missed the Snitch,
But all the girls see me and they all get the itch,
All because I'm the best player at Quidditch.

SIRIUS:
They say James's on top, but he's really not.
It's always me that gets the girls all hot.
I'm going to let the world know that gay, I'm not!
I should say James is gay to get Lily to stop . . .
I'm ready to hex the next Quidditch fan
That says-

EMMALINE VANCE:
Hey James, you're so the man!

SIRIUS:
You can be on top without playing Quidditch
But after Quidditch he gets the girls and I get nix.
And these are the same girls who see me and faint-

JAMES:
Padfoot, carry my broom!

SIRIUS:
Dude, your dog I ain't!
I don't want to play Quidditch; I'm not very good.

FRANK LONGBOTTOM:
Who the heck are you? Where's Jones and Wood?

PETER:
Merlin, I'm so sick of my "friends."
Time for me to go off and earn my own ends.
I told you it was me who pressed the knot on the tree.
The Marauders'd be nothing without me.
Underwear prank, I was in the back.
Werewolf prank, I was in the back.
When we get caught, I get detention,
But the teachers are always asking James the questions,
Like-

MCGONAGALL:
Who's in charge? What was the plan?

JAMES:
It wasn't me!

PETER:
There he goes again!
Anyway, I'm the shortest guy in the group.
Pudgy little body; shouldn't girls think I'm cute?
James once told me to trying flying to get buff;
I fell off my broom and couldn't get up.
Forget Gryffindor- I don't know how I got in-
I'm going to join up with the dark Slytherins.

JAMES:
Lily why can't you see you're the only one for me and it just tears me
up that you're not impressed that I'm the best player at Quidditch.

PETER:
Though I am pureblood I'm not really rich, ha ha
And though I have never actually caught the Snitch- die James-
One day I'll get all the girls to itch.
Even though I'm not the best player at Quidditch.
Quidditch, Quidditch,

SIRIUS (still stuck on the gay bit):
I like Hestia, and Emmaline . . .

PETER:
Quidditch, Quidditch,

SIRIUS:
And Alice and Marlene . . .

PETER:
Quidditch, Quidditch

SIRIUS:
And Greta and Lupin and--

PETER:
Quidditch, Quidditch

SIRIUS:
Aggh, no!

SIRIUS, PETER, and REMUS:
Quidditch . . .

JAMES:
The hottest Quidditch player in the world: James Potter!

JAMES (mimicking Snape):
I'm the straight best player at Quidditch
I get all the girls to look at my undergarments
But that's not hard because James flips me over-
Because, because . . . he's the best player at Quidditch.

looking around to see that everyone's abandoned him

Hey, where'd everybody go?

A filk by R.J. Lupin to the tune of Little Saint Nick by Sugar Ray

SCENE: It's the year of Harry's first Christmas (1980), and Sirius, Remus, and Peter have all come over to James and Lily's house to celebrate. One of Harry's baby's gifts is an infant toy broomstick from Sirius, with which Harry is playing with. And then, in all happiness, the four Marauders break into a song that involves the use of Harry's fanon-derived baby nickname, 'Pronglet'

JAMES, SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
Ooh...
Happy Christmas, Harry
Ooh...

JAMES:
Wella in this town called Godric's Hollow
There's a really cool son around that you should know
And he has his mum's eyes but he looks like dad
And it's going to be the best Christmas he's had

He's the little Pronglet
SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
Oooh... little Pronglet
JAMES:
He's the little Pronglet
SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
Oooh... little Pronglet

JAMES:
And already we see like dad he'll be a star
Plus the brains he got from mum will make him go far
He's riding a toy broom like it all is a game
When he's playing it for real then the world will change

He's the little Pronglet
SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
Oooh... little Pronglet
JAMES:
He's the little Pronglet
SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
Oooh... little Pronglet

JAMES, SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
A fly, fly, Harry
A fly, fly, Harry
A fly, fly, Harry
A fly, fly, Harry
SIRIUS:
Then hit Sniv'lly!

JAMES:
We're hoping when he grows he's like Lil' and me
But we're gonna have to wait 'til that day comes and see
One day he may wear glasses, but don't call him a nerd
'Cause he's gonna be the best wizard you've ever heard

He's the little Pronglet
SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
Oooh... little Pronglet
JAMES:
He's the little Pronglet
SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
Oooh... little Pronglet
Ah... Happy Christmas, Harry
JAMES:
He's the best son in the world
SIRIUS, REMUS, and PETER:
Ah... Happy Christmas, Harry
JAMES:
He's the bet son in the world
JAMES, SIRIUS, REMUS and PETER:
Ah...
Happy Christmas, Harry

A filk by Murasaki to the tune of Abraham, Martin and John by Dion Demucii

Remus Lupin just seems to lose everybody he loves.

REMUS:
Has anybody here seen my old friend James?
Where he's gone I can't be sure.
He fought for justice in our world,
But it seems evil conquered the good.
I just looked around, and he's murdered.

Anybody here seen my old friend Lily?
Where she's gone I can't be sure.
She fought for justice in our world,
But it seems evil conquered the good.
I just looked around, and she's murdered.

Didn't we love the things that they stood for?
Didn't we try to fight on for the things that they couldn't achieve?
That victory,
Some day soon.
It's gonna be one day--

Anybody here seen my old friend Sirius?
Where he's gone I can't be sure.
I thought I heard him whisper, as he slipped beyond the veil
To join James and Lily Potter

A filk by R.J. Lupin to the tune of Viva Forever by the Spice Girls

Just a little ode to Remus, the last Marauder (that counts anyway) and how things with the four used to be. Live on, Marauders! :)

Do you still remember how they used to be?
Mischievous students, quite clever and prudent
A lovely sight to see
All of them together
Had each other's back
Never to leave one and always receive fun
Their friendship never lacked

Where's Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs?

The last Marauder
He's still standing
Eversmiling through the days
Mourns the losses, though no stranger
To the pain that's in his haze

Everything was fine then, everything all right
Hadn't a care through school years that they faired
Everyday and full moon night
Nothing came between them, nothing ever could
Sometimes they'd fight but they'd soon reunite
And they always thought they would

Where's Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs?

The last Marauder
He's still standing
Eversmiling through the days
Mourns the losses, though no stranger
To the pain that's in his haze

Sadly he's alone now, he was such a fool
Though they would say they would stay come what may
How could he ever believed?

Where's Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs?

The last Marauder
He's still standing
Eversmiling through the days
Mourns the losses, though no stranger
To the pain that's in his haze

The last Marauder
He's still dreaming
Of those days left in the past
Days that were too good to be true
But ev'rything goes too fast

The last Marauder
He's still wond'ring
How we all get where we are
Is it fate or something greater
As he's looking to the stars

The last Marauder
He's still going
Though he feels this is all wrong
He survives it, passes by it
As he must still carry on

A filk by WolfWoman to the tune of B52s Love Shack

SIRIUS:
If you see a haunted house by the side of the road it's the
Creepiest house it's the Shriek Shack, yeah!

I'm headin' down to the Whomping Willow, lookin' for a place we can go
Looking for the place we can go, we can go,
We found us a tunnel at the base of the tree, and we're goin' on down
To the Shriek Shack, baby!
It won't matter there if we make some commotion
So hurry up and bring your wolfsbane potion!

The Shriek Shack is a creepy old place where we won't hurt nobody
Shriek Shack baby, bay-bee.
Shriek Shack baby, that's where it's at, Ooo Shriek baby, we won't attack

Sign says. Woo... stay away fools, the night rules at the Shriek Shack, baby!
Well it's set way back in the middle of a hill,
Just a creepy old shack and we gotta get back

Howling in the full moon
Howling in the top room
Howling in the mattress
Howling in the full moon!

The Shriek Shack is a creepy old place where we won't hurt nobody
Shriek Shack baby!, that's where it's at!
Howlin' and a fightin', feelin' monthly rages, 'cause Lupin's a werewolf
And I'm an Animagus
The whole shack's swayin'! The whole shack's swayin' when dog and wolf are
Movin' around, makin' sounds heard in town!

Everybody's hearin', everybody's fearin' baby!
Folks gonna stay inside while we get down
Dog and wolf are movin', dog and wolf are groovin' baby
Creepy little shack! Creepy little shack!

Jump in the tunnel; it goes down to our nest, and it's where we feel best!
It goes to the place where we can make commotion
So hurry up and bring your wolfsbane potion!

Run, run, run with the dog baby! Howl a little louder, Lupin!
Run, run, run with the dog baby! I can't hear you
Run, run!
With the dog!
Run, run!
With the dog!
Run, run!
With the dog!
Run, run!
You're WHAT?
Full Moon, Rising!

Shriek Shack, baby!
Shriek baby, that's where it's at
Howlin' and a fightin', playin' and a lovin' at the Shriek Shack

A filk by R.J. Lupin to the tune of Those Magic Changes from Grease

Anyway, this song is about what might happen if the Marauders were to discover Remus' phonograph. Hehe, if that ever turns out to be Canon...

SCENE: As James, Sirius, and Peter sit around the Gryffindor Common Room when they suddenly hear a strange noise that sounds like a swing song resembling those played by Professor Lupin in PoA...

SIRIUS:
What's that music in our domit'ry?
JAMES:
I don't know, but I think we should see
PETER:
I have never heard that song before
SIRIUS:
I don't want to hear it anymore

PETER:
But now the beat is going
JAMES:
And my feet are flowing
SIRIUS:
Now that song is going to be stuck in my head
Because it is
JAMES, SIRIUS, and PETER:
Strange jazzy music
So who does use it?

A mystery
This strange melody
What could it be?
PETER:
Hey, where is Moony?
'Cause I am sure that he will know
JAMES:
So to him we'll go
SIRIUS:
And we'll say, "what's the deal?
Why does this make us feel
JAMES, SIRIUS, and PETER:
Like we should go prance and dance
And that we're filled with never-ending song
Ooh, what is this?"

The boys decide to go upstairs and look in at the dormitory, where they find Remus listening to his phonograph. He blushes as his friends stare at him like he's gone mad, and then explains

REMUS:
Well, my friends, this is my phonograph
I know what you're thinking, so don't laugh
Understand that when I hear this swing
It can help me get through anything

When my heart is drumming
When full moon is coming
If that tune is strumming then I say I'll be okay that day
Oh, it's my phonograph
Oh, it helps make me laugh

Whoa- whoa- ah- oh
Whoa- whoa- ah- oh- yeah
Ah- ah- ah- ah- ah- ah-rooo!

A filk by R.J. Lupin to the tune of the same name by The Beatles

REMUS:
Here comes the sun
Du du du du
REMUS, JAMES, SIRIUS, and PETER:
Here comes the sun
REMUS:
And I say
REMUS, JAMES, SIRIUS and PETER:
I'm all right

JAMES, SIRIUS and PETER:
Little werewolf
REMUS:
It's been a long and bad full moon night
JAMES, SIRIUS, and PETER:
Little werewolf
REMUS:
And each time I become a fright

REMUS, JAMES, SIRIUS, and PETER:
Here comes the sun
Feel the sunlight
Here comes the sun
REMUS:
And I say
REMUS, JAMES, SIRIUS, AND PETER:
No more night

REMUS:
I'm a werewolf
And I'm returning to myself now
JAMES, SIRIUS, and PETER:
He's a werewolf
REMUS:
And I still feel those aches and ows

REMUS, JAMES, SIRIUS and PETER:
Here comes the sun
Here comes the sun
REMUS:
And I say
REMUS, JAMES, SIRIUS and PETER:
It's all done

Sun, sun, sun, no more moon
Sun, sun, sun, no more gloom
Sun, sun, sun, no more doom
Sun, sun, sun, no more moon
Sun, sun, sun, no more moon

JAMES, SIRIUS, and PETER:
Little werewolf
REMUS:
Now I see the beauty of the dawn
JAMES, SIRIUS, and PETER:
Little werewolf
REMUS:
I'm free and now I can go on

REMUS, JAMES, SIRIUS and PETER:
Here comes the sun
Feel the sunlight
Here comes the sun
REMUS:
And I say
REMUS, JAMES, SIRIUS, and PETER:
I'll have fun

Here comes the sun
Feel the sunlight
Here comes the sun
It's all done
It's all done

A filk by Fyre to the tune of the same name by Gwen Stefani

REMUS (sitting alone in the library of Hogwarts):
Discriminating time
Not a parody
Why did the years go by
Overlooking me…

James and Sirius sneak up from behind Remus, Sirius is holding a clock. James is laughing

CLOCK:
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock

JAMES:
Ha ha
Ha ha
Ha ha
Ha!

SIRIUS:
You're like a starry night stuck in the dark
No big situation
C'mon man, take a break!

JAMES:
So what if they say you're a monster
Naturally you're alright when you are alone
Why you care, mate? It's your life. You know it's really great.

SIRIUS:
Take a chance, werewolves can go

Peter pops up from behind

PETER:
Rooo! A- Arooo!!!

ALL THREE (James, Sirius, Peter):
What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin' for!?

What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin' for!?

Sirius places the clock on a nearby table

CLOCK:
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock

JAMES:
Take a chance lycanthrope!

PETER (using a quill to scratch Remus behind the ear):
You act like an old Grindylow
You're just another kid, why are you sitting in this place.

Remus grabs for Peter, but gets sidetracked by Sirius

SIRIUS & (PETER & JAMES)
Born to cast spells, bloom to stop them
You can't get rid of us with that little wolf-man show
You know it's really messed up how people judge and discriminate
(uh-huh)

Remus looks at Sirius, James and Peter oddly, and wonders why they are so musical

JAMES:
Life is short, you're really cool (uh-huh, yeah)

PETER:
Rooo!!A-Arooo!!

ALL THREE:
Take a good look, now
You're still our Remus J. Lupin
You've got a couple lupine problems
But wolfs bane can eas'ly solve them!
What you waitin
What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin' for!?

What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin'
What you waitin for!?

CLOCK:
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick tock

ALL THREE:
Take a chance lycanthrope!

REMUS (with a mini-headache)
I can't wait to go
Back to the Dorm room
Get me a real good nap.
I've really got to go
Why am I singing too?
Damn, you've got me hooked on this song!
AHHH!

ALL THREE:
Forget your li'l nap, now
We've got some mischief to manage
Gotta turn all the Owls green
And make Snape cause a big scene

ALL:
What we waitin'
What we waitin'
What we waitin'
What we waitin'
What we waitin for?!

What we waitin'
What we waitin'
What we waitin'
What we waitin'
What we waitin for?!

REMUS:
What we waitin' for
What we waitin' for

OTHERS:
Take a chance, lycanthrope!

SIRIUS:
What we waitin' for
What we waitin' for

JAMES AND PETER: Take a chance, lycanthrope!

ALL:
Take a chance, lycanthrope!
Take a chance, lycanthrope!

The song ends as Peter, James, and Sirius take off their masks; James being Peter, Peter being Sirius, Sirius being James. All laugh

A filk by Fyre to the tune of The Three Kings and I (What Really Happened) by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra

Setting: After seeing the memory in the Pensieve, Snape decides to tell Harry what it was really like growing up with Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs.

HARRY:
Occulmency night
The Potions Master's chiding
Another night to endure Snapey's wrath

SNAPE:
Potter, you've seen your dad and all his fans
Whose child you are and their mismatched friends
Heard my mem'ry tell it like my mem'ry does
But I'll tell you Potter how bad it really was

Now I know you'll ask me what I'm talking about
I'll tell you the part the Pensieve left out, yes I will

Now listen to what I say
I didn't let you see that whole day
For on that horrid evening
That werewolf teacher of yours Remus
He came to me.

Now Remus wasn't my
Greatest chum, you see
Only dumb Marauder that would talk to me
Well we got ourselves involved in a poker hand
When he told me that
He was the wolf-man

Now, I'll tell you Potter that at this time
The thought he was a werewolf completely blew my mind, yes it did

Said his friends knew of it too
And because of this his concern rapidly grew
So I asked him to say why
He said the others were all Animagi
And began to cry

So when the other Marauders
Had finally come here
They loathingly began to fill me in
Then Sirius Black turned to young Remus
And said "The only one to know
Had better be him"

Then James told Remus
If I recall, If I told anyone
He'd hex me raw
So Remus began to calm down James
But then Pettigrew saw
Lily out in the hall, yes he did

So I went out and talked to Evans
Filled her in on the chat, told her everything
Then Evans walked towards James
She slapped him hard
Then snogged his face
Then left us in
That dungeon space
And when no one had made a sound
We herd her laughing outside the door, yes we did
M-hmm-mm She was laughing

Then what a row we were then in
But with Remus on his side
I knew that in the end
I wouldn't win

I fought him fast
I jinxed him hard
'Till in the end we were
Wizard dueling outside
Underneath the stars

Expelliarmus!
Furnunculus!
Impedimenta!
Incarcerous!
Relashio!
Tarantallegra!

Now, Potter, I have reached the end
Of this story
When me and the Marauders found
Ourselves on a hill
And while I said the wolf-an had
Completely shocked me
What the Marauders did next
Shocked me far more still

After the fight, I felt so ashamed
But the Marauders helped
Me regain my name
They took me back to my dungeon land
But they had to act fast
Or else we'd all be banned, all be banned

That was the worst day
Of my life
Your dad took the girl
I had loved my whole life
And eventually you came along
But now, Potter
But now, Potter
Just go run along

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